Strange Magic

I guess I was a lonely kid because I used to talk to myself a lot, tell myself stories, interview myself. I still would, but I'm a little more self-conscious these days. That's something I'm going to work on, I think, but it may be a while before I talk to myself in public. In the meantime, I'm going to chat myself up in text format for a bit. For clarity's sake, let's say I am a chimera made up for a Good Twin (Stacy) and an Evil Twin (Tracy). Chimeras are more interesting than multiple personalities, which are fake.

Stacy: So, we haven't heard much from you lately. What have you been up to?
Tracy: Listening to ELO.
S: Electric Light Orchestra?
T: Yes.
S (Clearly not really interested): That's interesting.
T: Whatever. Indie music has never done anything for me except make my cry in public and mistakenly believe that my neuroses are socially acceptable.
S: Oh, wah, hipsters don't like you because you can't wear tapered jeans and never had a radio show. Boo hoos.
T: Hey, you're supposed to be the Good Twin.
S: If I was being the Bad Twin, I'd punch you. So apart from ELO?
T: I got dumped a while ago for not being fun enough.
S: That's awesome. I bet you really enjoy telling that story.
T: It's true. I do.
S: Do you think people get uncomfortable when you make fun of yourself?
T: I hope not. It's a defense mechanism. If I got rid of it, I might need to buy a gun. Or social skills.
S: Ba-dum-ching. Have you thought about being more fun?
T: Yeah, I've thought about it. I think I have to quit my job before I can be fun.
S: That's your answer for everything.
T: Well, it hasn't been disproved yet.
S: So you're going to quit your job.
T: Yep yep.
S: Okay. Let me know how that goes. And please do work on becoming more fun.
T: Right-o. Will do.